From Strawberry Shortcake to Gossip Girl, I have always seen examples of everlasting and sizeable friend groups. These, unfortunately, don’t mirror the contemporary teen experience of friendship.

Since, in your teens, you are constantly developing, friendship can be fluid. You meet a friend at a certain point in your life and there are two possible futures for your friendship. Option A: you grow together. Option B: you grow apart. Going into a friendship we never really know what the outcome is going to be. There is often a turning point, an event which makes you realise where your friendship is headed by how you and your friend approach it. Are you able to work through it and thus strengthen your friendship or do the values of you and your friend differ so much at this point that it’s impossible to reach a consensus?

Parting ways is painful but there is some beauty in it. You shared experiences, built memories and developed traits that will always be a part of you, even if you’re not friends with that person anymore. Each friendship creates your identity, and that lives forever. As they say “you are a collection of everyone you have ever loved”.

The social pressure, however, to stay friends even though you have grown apart creates discomfort and tension. Just like wearing the jeans you bought in year 6 that don’t fit you anymore. Because you have grown. It is better for both you and your friend to part ways since you are no longer meant for each other.

So what even is my message? Don’t be afraid to admit that you have grown apart. It’s for the better.

(as I ponder more about this topic, I might add to this entry)